The Three Stages of Man:
He believes in Santa Claus.
He doesn’t believe in Santa Claus.
He is Santa Claus!
It was the Christmas season and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner,
“What is your offense?”
“I did my Christmas shopping early this year,” cried the prisoner.
“There’s nothing wrong with that,” said the Judge. “How early were you doing this shopping?”
“Before the store opened,” answered the prisoner
On Christmas Eve Santa Claus met an honest politician and a kind lawyer while riding up in an elevator of a very exclusive hotel.
Just before the doors opened the three of them noticed a 1000NT bill lying on the floor. Which one of them do you think picked it up?
Answer: Santa of course! Why? Because everybody knows that the other two don’t exist!
What do you do if one of Santa’s reindeer swallows your pencil?
Answer: use a pen
What does Santa Claus like to do in his garden?
Answer: he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe
What can Santa give away and still keep?
Answer: a cold.